Alhamdulillah, this ramadhan brings me so many lesson and blessing in life. I was listening to my husband who told me about what he heard at the mosque earlier. Simply he said that the best job and career is when it makes you closer to Allah. I remember at the time when i was still working at the office, i kept my prayers in 'injury time' especially for Ashar calls, i ussually did it at 5pm, not in mushalla or mosque but in an empty meeting room or in my boss's office (actually my office has 3 mushalla at the 20th, 19th, and 16th fl but still..), and i did it really fast to catch-up another deadline that i have to fulfill. Astagfirullah.. I was an idiot, why would i have to put 'world stuffs' at the first place and ignoring what Allah told us to do? it was simple, for the monthly salary (what a shame..), or another overtime addition, or great performance, and becoming a high achiever. However, i was working very hard.. too hard.. and with that attitude, i didn't get anything, in fact, i believe i told you earlier about how my mid-performance was terrible. I think i get it now.
This is the Hadist i actually heard long before i listened to what my husband said - and i think i was only listening without understanding the meaning at the time.. shame.
Barangsiapa memperbaiki hubungannya dengan Allah maka Allah akan menyempurnakan hubungannya dengan manusia. Barangsiapa memperbaiki apa yang dirahasiakannya maka Allah akan memperbaiki apa yang dilahirkannya (terang-terangan). (HR. Al Hakim)
Oh another thing, on my last post, i thought that i haven't told you about the privilege of being a housewife, which i actually did. I said i am happier.
There must be plenty of reasons why people get happier than ever. One of the reason that i am happier now that my husband is guiding me -and keeping- me in the right path, that way i will always close to Allah. My husband always share what he got from the mosque. I love it. It helps me understand stuffs in the right point of view.
There a lot more thing that i have to consider as privilege, but sometime i just need a time to understand it because this is something new, marriage life has always been something new in everyday. Still don't get it?
Well, here an example. It was the first day i came up to the office after miscarriage bed rest, and my boss called me to get to her office. She was asking me about my feeling, and my answer was : "i am fine but i was really upset."
I was physically recovered but i felt upset. When i got married i knew i will be a mother - one day - but who knew that i will get pregnant so fast after three months of marriage? I knew nothing about being pregnant or even bigger to have a baby. So i started to learn, i read books about pregnancy, i drink and eat nothing but healthy food, i don't drive and took cab everyday to reach the office, and i kept eating those pills, hormones and vitamins the doctor told me. I was shaping myself to be ready for motherhood. Then i got a miscarriage. I was really sad and upset cos i've been preparing everything i can to be a mother. That was a big lesson.
It also happen in marriage life, everyday is a new lesson, you never experience what will happen tomorrow, so it is understandable if sometime we feel upset, we feel not right, or feel discomfort. We never been there, we never done that. It can be fun, sparkle, or maybe awkward and hurtful. BUT. Trust me all the thing happens in your day-by-day marriage life is simply to train you, to get you prepared for something bigger. My un-expert suggestion is: never ever jump to a conclusion in a situation at home. Often, when you explore more, listen carefully, improving your willing to understand, and keep trying to be a better person and a better wife, you will find more privileges than what you can imagine.
So, i hope you understand why i was answering 'i have no idea'
I must be less-exploring the situation, jumping fast to the conclusion without trying understand more, or i was not listening, i just hadn't seen it yet at the time.
I hope this will be a good share for you all.
